The omnipresence of grief & energy

It’s been nearly 4 months since my big brother, Saunder, passed away. I miss him so so much. He was my buddy. The grief and sadness lies just below the surface of the smile. I am always grieving, but somedays (more than less) I feel like the pain will never end. He is still with us in spirit but I miss his physical being and our physical experience. Experiences and adventures with him is the greatest gift and the greatest loss. I put on a smile as best I can but it’s really hard. Thank you so much to all the people that check in on me and my fam and talk with me about the grief and the sadness.

Saunder has always been a fighter and an adventurer. Everyday he strived for something bigger and faced new challenges. He beat cancer and had the best attitude at the bottom of the mountain, end of a trail, and the top of a summit.

He saw me through the best and the worst. When I had a softball size tumor removed from my right lung he was there at 11pm sitting with me in teh ICU after waking up from an 11hr surgery. He is a healer and a leader.

I continue to grieve his loss and look for all the signs I can get from him. Saunder is here, with all of those he touched, in spirit and energy.